Rainbow Human » Inner Work » Exploring our Beliefs

Think about someone who bothers you and use written words to answer the questions below. Once you have finished writing/typing, re-read what you have written and add more content. Please avoid censoring yourself; the more you criticize, the better.

1. List what that person did wrongly and your feelings about it. Use the format: I feel X at Y because of Z.
[Example: I feel angry at James because he does not care about me.]

2. List the concrete evidence that proves that person’s wrongdoing.
[Example: James never called when I was sick last month to check how well I was doing.]

3. List out what that person should have done correctly.
[Example: When I was sick last month, James should have visited me, hugged me, and played my favorite movies to entertain me.]

4. List out and criticize that person’s negative character.
[Example: James is very selfish. James does not care about other people’s feelings.]

5. Describe what you do not wish to experience.
[Example: I never want to experience James not caring about me again. I never want to experience James hurting me again.]

6. Describe the worst that can happen if that person does not change their ways.
[Example: If James continues not to care about others, he will be lonely forever. If James does not care about me, I will cut off all my ties with him.]

 

After we have written in detail what we think about that person, we will go through each statement and ask questions to understand what we have written more deeply.

A. Is your belief accurately describing Reality? [Answer: Yes/No]
B. What do you feel if you never had this belief?
C. Is there a painless reason to hold on to this belief? [Answer: Yes/No]
D. Is there a reason to let go of this belief? [Answer: Yes/No]
E. Can you allow yourself to welcome this belief? [Answer: Yes/No] (Feel the emotions associated with this belief as strongly as possible when answering.)
F. Can you allow yourself to let go of this belief? [Answer: Yes/No] (If yes, proceed to use releasing statements.)

G. If we reverse the statement towards ourselves, think of some examples to support the new statement. [For instance, James does not care about me. -> I do not care about myself.]
H. If we reverse the statement towards other people, think of some examples to support the new statement. [For instance, James does not care about me. -> I do not care about James.]
I. If we reverse the statement towards the opposite intent, think of some examples to support the new statement. [For instance, James does not care about me. -> James should not care about me.]
J. If we reverse the statement’s meaning completely, consider some examples to support the new statement. [For instance, James does not care about me. -> James cares about me.]

 

Visit Byron Katie’s website for more information about this type of technique.

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