Alice laughed. ‘There’s no use trying,’ she said. ‘One can’t believe impossible things.’
‘I daresay you haven’t had much practice,’ said the Queen. ‘When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.
― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
Thoughts are harmless until we believe them. We then paint ourselves into stories restricted by these thoughts. Most of us don’t interact with the world as it is; we interact with the world as we believe it to be. We live within self-created stories that tell us:
- who we are (i.e. our identity and that of other people)
- what is happening (i.e. our role and that of other people)
- why things are happening (i.e. our intentions and that of other people)
- how things will result from what is happening (i.e. predicting the future situation)
The tendency to create stories is so strong that most of us will volunteer to debate complex issues which we have little knowledge or expertise in – approach anyone and start discussing any topic related to politics, sex, money or religion (including atheism) to see this in action. Conspiracy theories, which simplify very complex situations into easy to understand scenarios with well-defined solutions, are great examples.
If we can’t unconditionally accept Reality as it is, then we can only blame our experience of imperfection on something other than ourselves. Being a powerless victim stops us from changing our Reality. Our life becomes much easier if we learn to simply accept what is happening right now with grace. When we see Life happening for us and not against us, we proceed without doubt and hesitation to do what we choose to do.
We don’t have to like Reality. In fact, it is rare to find anyone who likes every part of their Reality. However, Reality will keep reminding us that it is the boss: whenever we try to pick a fight with it, we will lose 100% of the time. The people around us will keep doing their best to make us angry, sad, disgusted, hurt, doubtful and more. They will attack and hurt us until we find our own freedom out of our stories. They won’t change until we do, because it is our own business to accept our own Reality.
What do we feel when we believe that we need money? Do we enslave ourselves to get money? Do we live fake lives so we get money? Do we defile our own sacred spaces and hurt ourselves to get money? And likewise for sex, status, revenge, time, rights, knowledge, health and every other pursuit of Humanity.
When we say “I love you”, are we saying that to the person who we are speaking to, or to the character within our story? When someone else says “I love you” to us, is that message for us or is that for the character that we are playing? What is it like to love someone who does not even exist? What is it like to be a shape-shifting chameleon who tries to transform into the ideal lover?
Many of us have became expert actors/actresses trying to be who we are not, to the extent that we have forgotten our real identity. It is time to stop and get real. Either love each other for who we are, or walk away without drama.
Adults have always been trying to change the world in order to be happy. It is time to learn from children how we can be happy by simply choosing to be happy. Let us proclaim together:
I don’t need a luxurious home. I don’t need a girlfriend/boyfriend/spouse. I don’t need to be successful. I don’t need to be rich and powerful. I don’t need to be free to travel around the world. I don’t need to fulfill my life mission. I don’t even need to be alive. What I have, is just what I need right now. What I need, is just what I have right now.
Whenever we think we need something, just ask, “Do I really believe it?” Then move on with the real business of Life.